Tagged: Review

Jumper Review


Jumper is a pretty interesting concept for a film. If you are a Jumper then all you have to do is think of a place and that’s where you teleport. Makes watching TV very difficult though. Watch a disaster movie and it’s like “Oops I fell into a volcano.” So it’s not something you want, but the travel would be nice.


The film follows David Rice (played by Max Thieriot and also by Hayden Christensen) as he discovers his warping powers after falling into a frozen lake and almost drowning. He runs from his dad and robs a bank, getting a place of his own. The film then jumps 8 years into the future. There’s no reason for it to be 8 years in the future, but it is. Anyway he meets up with childhood sweetheart Millie (Played by AnnaSophia Robb and also by Rachel Bilson) who wanted to travel the world, so they go to Rome (On a plane of all things).


However he isn’t the only Jumper, there are lots of them (Well, we see about three or four of them in the film in total). There are also a group of people who kills jumpers called Paladins. The main Paladin is called Roland (Played by Samuel L Jackson). The Paladins’ jobs are made more difficult because most of the time whenever they get a tip off, they are led to the location of a woolly jumper instead (That’s definitely in the movie). Naturally in several points of the film, David and Roland meet up because Roland finds out that David robbed the bank and therefore is now trying to kill him.


Despite being the protagonist, David Rice is the least interesting main character because we don’t really get to find out what he is thinking most of the time other than through his actions. Yes he is immature and naive, but that doesn’t necessarily make for a compelling character because we don’t get much insight. The story probably would have been better off being told through the point of view of Millie because unlike him she says what she is thinking. There is another Jumper character called Griffin (Played by Jaime Bell) who says what he is thinking. The writers probably thought that some people would prefer Griffin to David because of his Anti-Heroness, but I prefer him to David because Griffin occasionally makes sense. Yes I know that David is supposed to be new and inexperienced, but it took him 8 years to find out the existence of other Jumpers. You can’t do something for 8 years and still be new.


There are parts of the plot that just don’t work. For example later on in the film (This isn’t a spoiler) we find out that David made his first jump when he was 5. Who doesn’t remember what they were doing when they were 5? Also at the beginning of the film David tells us that his dad is not a very good parent so I presume we are supposed to dislike him, but we don’t see any examples of bad parenting from him. The film even gets us to like him later on, so I’m not entirely sure what I’m supposed to think about him. Maybe in the novel you can read about him being a bad parent, but I’m not reviewing novel/film combos. If it’s not in the film narrative then it’s not in the film narrative, and I’m not going to check the novel. The novel doesn’t even sound that good because for the plot to work, most people in the film can’t know what Jumpers are, which considering that Paladins have apparently been after Jumpers for centuries sounds a bit silly. Even Griffin, a savvy jumper, jumps right in front of hundreds of people in the film, and possibly in front of thousands over time.


That all said there are some brilliant set pieces in the film. In the beginning it promises to take us to great locations and it delivers. There are some really good action sequences, especially in the last third. I enjoyed watching the technology the Paladin’s use to catch and kill the jumpers, even if they wouldn’t all work in real life and the Paladins being able to use them come out of nowhere plot wise. It’s really satisfying to see the characters jump from place to place. There’s also nothing really awful about the film, but considering that I need to say that just to raise some expectations is a bit sad.


The reason why the good stuff about the film is squished down here is because it’s really good at what I don’t prioritise – the action sequences and it’s quite difficult to describe them in text without just telling you what happens. The basic idea is good and the action sequences are fantastic. But the writing needs some work. This film is enjoyable, provided that the main character doesn’t annoy you too much. I’ll give Jumper a 6/10, and just hope that rating doesn’t seem too out of place considering my review.




The Huntsman: Winter’s War Review


Neither of these two are the main characters of this movie.

The Huntsman: The Winter’s War is a sequel/prequel to a movie I barely remember. There were two Snow White movies in close proximity to each other, and I preferred the other one (Mirror Mirror) because despite the lower budget, the characters and events were more entertaining. I’m not doing spoilers, but this movie has a lot of back story so let’s go.

So Queen Ravenna (Charlize Theron) from the first movie had a sister all along, whose name is Freya (Emily Blunt). The Queen doesn’t believe in love and Freya wants to prove her wrong by falling in love. So she falls in love, but the guy burns part of the castle and kills the queen, but the killing part isn’t made clear until later on in the movie. Maybe it was clear to other people, and maybe they said that and I wasn’t paying attention, but all I saw was that the guy burnt part of the castle and I was like “huh?” They could have told that part better.

Anyway Freya runs off to the North and makes her own kingdom and turns it into a land of ice, because she has ice powers somehow.  Maybe she should have been called Froyo. She puts in a law that makes it illegal to fall in love. She kidnaps children and raises them to become her army. They grow up and two of them fall in love. One of them being the Huntsman (Chris Hemsworth) and the other is Sara (Jessica Chastain) who gets killed early on because Freya finds out via one of her owl spies and creates an ice wall between them. The Huntsman (Who is called Eric during informal events) has no choice but to watch one of Freya’s soldiers kill Sara.

Finally we get to the bit after the first movie. The Magic Mirror that Snow White now has has been stolen, and she sends the Huntsman to get it back. She sends a couple of Dwarves with him. Maybe she should have kidnapped children and raised them to become her army. I know it’s not heroic, but it’s still better than sending out a couple of dwarves. They also meet a couple more dwarves, but these ones are women.

Chris Hemsworth is good as The Huntsman, the dwarves are entertaining even if they just serve as characters for the Huntsman to talk to. There’s a line about female dwarves being ugly that doesn’t have anything to do with the rest of the movie. It could have been used as character development, but it isn’t. Freya just looks glum throughout.

Kristen Stewart does not appear as Snow White in this movie. She’s referred to several times, and she’s the one who sends the Huntsman on his quest. I think we even see the back of Snow White at one point. But Snow White is not in this movie, and it really needed her. If they were going to have somebody play her back half, then they should have had someone play her front half as well. Preferably the same person both sides. It feels weird to have people talk about her and then have her not show up.

The mirror is supposed to be important. We know that the mirror can tell you things, but we are aware that it can do something else because we see the effect it can cause. We don’t find out what that something else is until later, but it’s not presented to us in an interesting way. The creatures that guard the mirror, they are foreshadowed in an earlier line but we don’t know anything about them other than what we initially see, then they disappear for the rest of the movie. It should be an important scene but we aren’t given a reason to care or feel excited and so I felt bored.

The twist near the end, while silly, does mean that there is some reason to feel invested at the end. This movie is ok, the characters are entertaining, but most of the plot isn’t. I’ll give it a 5/10 because while there is nothing I can hate about it, it should have been better.



The Apprentice 11 Task 6: Bringing the House Down (Literally)

Ok, who the hell greenlighted this task? The candidates are unable to wash cars ON A GOOD YEAR, and yet YOU DECIDED TO SEND THEM OFF TO DO HANDYWORK?!! Are you mad? Half of one team going off to do pointless market research really was the winning scenario, wasn’t it.

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